This past Friday, it was my birthday (I was born on June, 5th. 1981.) which means I turned 39 this year! Quite scary, I'm not going to lie! The thought of this year being the last year of my thirties, makes me a little anxious, haha! I should probably be saying: "Age is just a number", or "The older, the wiser", or a similar cliche', but I'd rather just open up about my true feelings.
Now I don't think that being 40 is old, but what scares me is how quickly the time flies! I can't seem to understand when and where did my twenties and thirties go so quickly!!!
I'm not so scared of aging, in terms of getting fine lines and wrinkles, but I'm scared of that part of aging where my body just gets too old to have children, to reproduce.
I consider myself blessed with my little son! When I became a first time Mom, at the age of 35, I didn't think I was ever going to feel the desire to have more kids. But with time, I started feeling it. This voice inside of me, calling out for another child. Because my husband and I are into this parenting adventure all on our own, it's not easy to take this decision to try for another child, knowing that we can't count on anybody to help us, ever. Most times I'm 24/7 with my little one, as my hubby often travels for work.
When is the right time to try for a second child?
Well, certainly before your fourties, I'd say!
And certainly not when you're struggling in raising your first born (I don't actually think that I'm "struggling", but I'm certainly giving 100% of myself), and during a world pandemic!
But we can't put our lives on hold, years still go by and they do count! Next year, I'll be 40. And then what? So, you do get the general idea of what's on my mind.
I never ever thought I'd want to have kids in the first place, but luckily I changed my mind around my mid thirties and gave a beautiful life to this world!
If I was any smarter, I would have made this decision entering my thirties, and I wouldn't have waited for such a long time, doubting and questioning myself. But you can't turn back time. You can only learn from past experiences.
So my message to all of you, reading this, and recognizing yourself in some parts of it, is not to keep postponing this decision about becoming a mother. It's truly the best thing that can happen to you, and a continuous source of joy and happiness.
I don't know what the future holds for me, as I'm not alone in this decision, but obviously my hubby's words count too. I just hope that I'm going to be at peace with whatever outcome it may be.
I'd love to hear your stories! I don't often write about these things on my blog, as I usually write about more superficial things, but this is another thing I'd like to change / switch up a bit, here in the future!
I guess it being my birthday, getting so close to the big 4 0 made me reflect on things even more and I felt like sharing these thoughts with you!
Now, on a lighter note, let me share with you some pics from my birthday, and some birthday gifts that I received, that I'm so grateful on!
Btw...I spent half day in my pajamas, and having afternoon nap with my son. In the afternoon my in-laws came by, and they were so sweet, they brought a cake and presents (they aren't always like this, lol!). In the evening I went to take a long shower, washed my hair, and put on a new pajamas, haha!
It was actually nice to have my in-laws come over, after a long quarantine period here in Italy, and not being able to socialize. It felt good, and I was happy :-)
|My father in law brought me these two lovely rings from Samarcanda jewellery|
The one on the left is silver with labradorite stones and madreperla, and the other one is a simple wooden ring, made in India.
|No make up kind of day :-)|
|My hubby's present was this new vacuum cleaner (by Bosch), and my little one offered to clean instead of me :-)|
My boys <3
|39 is not 40!|
|happy with my little one!|
|since I'm spending so much time at home...UGG slippers :-)|
Another gift from my hubby
|Helena Christensen for H&M black T-shirt with floral print|
The following are the gifts from my Mum :-)
|these high waisted beige pants are going to be ideal for this season!|
|This is how I imagined the complete styling, the belt is vintage leather,|
|I'm in love with these Dr. Marten's shoes|
|Another lovely gift by my in-laws, this big bag is ideal for grocery shopping, or going to the beach!|
I hope you enjoyed reading this post!
Have a lovely day y'all :-)